Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
