Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
