Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
if i can run in heels then i can drive
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
