just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
