if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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