i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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