I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
