Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize