good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
