I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
