apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Holy sore nipples Batman
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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