omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
