Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
