Dual....:-)
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Never underestimate the power of titties
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
