that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
