You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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