It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
