i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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