My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
