no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
