let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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