He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
