i wish my penis had a tongue
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
