u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
