Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
