Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
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