I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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