do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize