Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize
