i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
