He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
