so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
