hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize
