he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Randomize
