she was so not down for the gang bang
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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