Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
