please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
