I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
