Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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