Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
