is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
