that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
