onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
