somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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