That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
