All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
