the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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