the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
high people should be assigned attendants
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
