I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
