at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
