Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
